Happy Thanksgiving: Singletude Gives Thanks for Readers and Progress

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! You know what I'm thankful for today? Singletude readers! You've doubled since this time last year, and I'm so thankful to all of you who stop by, whether for just one post of interest or to keep up with the latest twice a week. I'm especially grateful to those of you who add your voices to the discussion, commenting on the posts and sharing your own opinions and experiences. In the coming year, I hope more of you who follow Singletude will join in the conversation. This year, I'd like to show my appreciation by giving back to you!

First of all, I'd like to know what you like about Singletude and what you want to see more of so it can better meet your needs and interests. There's a poll today, so please take a minute to give your feedback, and if you have any ideas that don't fit neatly into multiple choice answers, feel free to leave a comment below.

Second, the next Singletude Giveaway Contest will be announced the day after Thanksgiving and will run throughout the holiday season. I'm excited to have another opportunity to reward the amazing readers who have stuck by this blog and grown with it for almost two years now, even if I can only do that in a small way.

And now, in the spirit of the holiday, I want to list five advances for singles that I'm thankful for this year:


1. The Affordable Health Care for America Act
One of the most glaring disparities between singles and marrieds is their access to health care. Under our current system, a married employee can give his or her insurance benefits to a spouse, but singles have no recourse if they are unemployed, self-employed, or work for businesses that don't provide insurance. Therefore, singles are more likely to be uninsured than married couples are. The Affordable Health Care for America Act, though not as ideal as a single-payer plan, provides for an insurance exchange that includes a public option, which would eliminate dependence on employer-based coverage, helping to level the playing field between the married and the unmarried. The bill has already been passed in the House and is waiting for Senate approval. Please tell your senator to vote yes!

2. The Designated Beneficiary Agreement Act in Colorado
In April of 2009, Colorado led the way toward a more equitable legal system that values all relationships, not just marital ones. The Designated Beneficiary Agreement Act allows any two unmarried adults, regardless of relationship, to enter into a contract by which they're given many of the same privileges that most states currently reserve for married couples. These include the rights to joint acquisition of property; guardianship or conservatorship; estate and benefit inheritance; and medical proxy, hospital visitation, wrongful death suit, and disposition of remains. To read a full list of entitlements granted by the Designated Beneficiary Agreement Act, see this document.

3. The Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Equality Amendment Act in Washington, DC
This is primarily thought of as a bill to protect LGBT domestic partnerships. However, what singles of any sexual orientation should know is that it also protects unmarried people who want to establish legally recognized nonsexual relationships. According to the DC City Council Committee on Public Safety, "As domestic partnerships apply equally to same-sex and opposite-sex couples, as well as to non-sexual relationships, the Committee believes that preserving the right to register is necessary." In fact, the controversy over gay marriage has had the unintended side effect of calling attention to the myriad ways in which our legal system is rigged against singles. Books like Beyond (Straight and Gay) Marriage: Valuing All Families under the Law by Nancy D. Polikoff have capitalized on that and stirred public interest and discussion. The bill is up for a final vote in December.

4. National Unmarried and Single Americans Week
Since the 1980s, it rolls around every September, but it's only in the last few years or so that anyone has really paid attention. It's still not as widely covered as it could be, and much of the coverage it does get is devoted to analyzing the "problem" of singleness rather than normalizing it. However, a week set aside to observe the role of singles in society is much better than no week at all. Plus, it seems to have been the gateway to more positive celebrations in other countries, such as China, which started Singles Day in the '90s, and Sweden, which has Singelfest.

5. The National Singles Association (NSA)
The National Singles Association (NSA) is the only membership-based organization for single adults to offer group-rate health and life insurance. It also guarantees discounts for members at participating airlines, retail stores, restaurants, professional services, and more. There are lots of clubs and online communities for singles and even some advocacy groups, but this is the first one to function like a union in negotiating deals with powerful corporations on behalf of singles.


There have been other encouraging signs that matrimania is beginning to crumble; these are just a few standouts. We still have a long way to go before we can say that singlism has been dismantled and that singles and marrieds are truly equal, not just in the eyes of the law but in the eyes of our families, friends, and neighbors. But, little by little, as the ranks of the unmarried swell and more people count singles among their inner circle or--surprise--discover that they're single themselves, awareness is growing that the nuclear family model of yesteryear not only doesn't apply to much of the population but actually disenfranchises it. That's prompting indignation, which, in turn, spurs change. I'm thankful for the changes we've seen so far and for the changes yet to come.


What advances have singles made that you're thankful for?


Fun Link of the Day




Do you have a question for Clever Elsie about some aspect of the single life? Have an unpublished rant or rave about singlehood? Write in, and you just might see your question in a "Singletude Q&A" or your rant or rave in a "Singletude Sound-off"! Singletude makes every effort to republish submissions in their original form but reserves the right to edit your submission for length and clarity.

Singles Are 93 Million Votes Strong: Who Cares?

Here it is again--Election Day. I hope that you all have registered to vote and will be turning out at the polls en masse to raise your voices for the singles community. But if you're wondering who is raising a voice for us, you're not alone.

We've been a hot topic in Gallup polls, CNN headlines, and, yes, movies. But as singles advocate Dr. Bella DePaulo noted before the primaries and again a few days ago, this hasn't translated into more than a cursory nod from the candidates, not even from Barack Obama, the choice of 60% of single voters.

I'm going to pick on Obama for a minute simply because he is the favored candidate among the majority of singles. If you visit his web site and view the drop-down menu under "People," you will see 23 special-interest demographics. One of them must be "Singles," right? Nope. There are "Arab Americans," "Rural Americans," even "Sportsmen." But no "Singles."

Now point your mouse to "Issues" and select "Civil Rights." I quote: "Obama and Biden will work to overturn the Supreme Court's recent ruling that curtails women’s and racial minorities' ability to challenge pay discrimination. They will also pass the Fair Pay Act to ensure that women receive equal pay for equal work and the Employment Non-Discrimination Act to prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity or expression." Where are the words "or marital status"? Nowhere to be found.

How about "Economy"? Surely this is a subject of consequence to singles...But no. The headline reads, "Barack Obama will provide a tax cut for working families." In fairness to him, the following paragraph clarifies that individuals will also be eligible for a tax break. But then why not make the headline more inclusive, replacing "working families" with "workers"?

Hop over to "Healthcare," an issue that disproportionately affects single people. It starts out the right way, referring to what Obama will do for "all Americans," but once he's talking numbers, it's all about families again: "The Obama plan will lower health care costs by $2,500 for a typical family..." Nice to know, but what about for a typical individual? Do we not exist until we have a spouse and kids?

Given this singlism, it's no wonder that Obama's campaign devotes an entire section to "Family" but none to "Singles."

Again, I'm picking on Obama because he's the candidate who's supposed to support the underdogs of this country. A glance at McCain's site will prove that he's just as family-focused, but then, that's a core value of the Republican platform, so it should come as no surprise. And I'm not contending that neither of the candidates should support families; the family unit has always been central to human life, though a smaller, more constricted unit has replaced the historical norm in the U.S. However, we singles represent an enormous swath of the population and should also be recognized as an important constituent group with needs and concerns of our own.

Despite that singles still have a long way to go on the road to equality, I still urge you to make your statement at the polls today. Singletude has already endorsed a candidate, the one whose policies I believe will help singles the most, even if they're not specifically intended to do so. Here's how the candidates stack up on major issues that affect singles:



Civil Rights

Obama--Will work to end employment discrimination, though nothing is specifically promised for singles.

McCain--Civil rights? What's that?


Economy

Obama--Proposes a tax cut of $500 per individual and reinstatement of higher taxes on those earning more than $250,000. Wants to dispense with taxes for 10 million low-income Americans and seniors who take home less than $50,000 a year. Will tax record oil company profits and redistribute them to consumers. Vows to pump $50 billion into job growth and health, education, housing, and heating. Will reform the mortgage industry to prevent another housing bubble and subsequent crisis. Supports "fair trade," not free trade, which has shipped millions of American jobs overseas, unions, an increased minimum wage, and tax relief for small businesses and start-ups. Suggests flexible work schedules, although he also wants to expand more specifically family-friendly (presumably "marrieds-friendly") programs. Wants to invest in green, clean energy jobs.

McCain--Vows to somehow strengthen the dollar, for which he apparently has a magic, secret formula. Does not propose tax cuts for the middle class unless you have dependents. Does propose even more tax relief for high-income earners and corporations but not specifically for small businesses or start-ups. Wants the American public to essentially bail out delinquent homeowners. Supports even further deregulation of free trade, which has shipped millions of American jobs overseas. Suggests flexible work schedules, although he also wants to expand more specifically family-friendly (presumably "marrieds-friendly") programs. Wants to invest in green, clean energy jobs but also in traditional, "dirty" fuels and dangerous nuclear power. Will work for various tax breaks on gasoline but will lower the priority on ethanol.


Health Care

Obama--Promises to institute a national health care plan for the uninsured. (Those who are already insured can opt to keep their current insurance.) The health care plan is called "affordable," and tax credits towards its purchase or purchase of an approved private plan are guaranteed to those who need them, although we are not given any concrete numbers. Intends to fund the plan by streamlining bureaucracy in the health care system, increasing preventive care, and allowing the Bush tax cuts for the upper class to expire. Supports the elimination of many current insurance practices that disadvantage consumers such as preexisting condition exclusions, premium inflation, blockage of generic and overseas drug distributors, denial of mental health coverage, and much more. Wants to make health care more affordable for employers.

McCain--Promises a heath care tax credit of $2,500 per individual. However, this is not enough to cover the cost of insurance for the average person over 45 as well as for residents of 13 states in which the average policy costs at least $500 more. Will encourage consumers to buy insurance across state lines, but critics argue that this will lead to a monopoly of cheap, low-quality policies. Hopes to make insurance more "portable," which some claim will abolish the employer-based system. Agrees with some but not all of Obama's industry reforms.


The Iraq War

Obama--Claims he will immediately phase out our presence in Iraq.

McCain--Prepared to hunker down in Iraq for the long haul. Promises "victory."


Poverty

Obama--Committed to improving the job outlook for low-income Americans (including "perks" that really shouldn't be perks like sick leave and retirement plans) and investing in affordable housing.

McCain--Poverty? What's that?


Women

Obama--Encourages research on women's health issues, tougher laws prohibiting violence against women, female entrepreneurship, and accessible birth control.

McCain--Women? What're they?


Anti-singles Action

McCain would also take actions that would actually work against singles, such as strengthening the institution of marriage to "preserve the traditional family," which smart singles who have read their history books will know is anything but traditional. As usual, I will repeat that I have no objection whatsoever against marriage and, in fact, think it's a healthy, admirable commitment. What I object to is how our government rewards marriage at the expense of singles.



If any of you are still undecided, I hope the above comparison has helped to persuade you in one direction or the other depending on which issues are important to you as a single. Change won't happen overnight, but if we speak up for ourselves louder and louder at every election, someone is bound to hear.


Do you think that singles are largely ignored by politicians? If so, do you have any examples of this? Which candidate do you think is more supportive of issues that singles value?


Fun Link of the Day


Do you have a question for Clever Elsie about some aspect of the single life? Have a rant or rave about singlehood? Write in, and you just might see your question in a Singletude Q&A or your rant or rave in a Singletude Sound-off!

Singles, Go Vote!

Today is Super Tuesday, the day that 24 states hold primaries or caucuses. If you live in one of these states and are registered to vote, get out there and support your favorite candidate!

Singles, we are a large demographic (up to 50% of the U.S. population by some estimates), and we have the power to tip this vote in the direction of a nominee who will work to implement policies that will be singles-friendly.

So many of us singles are without health care because we don't have a national plan in place. So many of us have watched the wealthy get wealthier due to tax cuts that favored them while we continued to struggle. So many of us can't afford to get a college education or, if we scrimp and save to get one, are saddled with debt we can't pay because tuition is out of control and starting salaries have been depressed by outsourcing, insurance inflation, and the tyranny of big business. So many of us are crammed into tight quarters with roommates or parents who shouldn't have to support us anymore because the cost of housing has soared. It's time for us singles to send a clear message that we're also American citizens, and we deserve an economy that makes the American dream possible for us, too!

The following is a list of all the states holding primaries today and the times polls close in each. Unless otherwise noted, both major parties are holding the vote today:

Alabama--7:00pm
Alaska--6:00pm
Arizona--7:00pm
Arkansas--7:30pm
California--8:00pm
Colorado--7:00pm
Connecticut--8:00pm
Delaware--8:00pm
Georgia--7:00pm
Idaho--7:00pm
Illinois--7:00pm
Kansas (Democratic only)--7:00pm
Massachusetts--8:00pm
Minnesota--7:59pm
Missouri--7:00pm
Montana (Republican only)--8:00pm
New Jersey--8:00pm
New Mexico (Democratic only)--7:00pm
New York--9:00pm
North Dakota--8:00pm
Oklahoma--7:00pm
Tennessee--8:00pm
Utah--8:00pm
West Virginia (Republican only)--closed

If you're wondering, Singletude endorses Senator Barack Obama. But you need to vote for whoever you believe will change our lives for the better.

You still have time! Go vote!

If you want to endorse your candidate, put on your speechwriting hat and feel free to leave a comment!


Fun Link of the Day

Singles and Politics: A Single Vote Is All It Takes

Someone I can no longer remember--if it was someone famous, please don't sue me unless you really, really want my stamp collection--once said that statistics are meaningless until you make a story out of them. Now it's time to take yesterday's stats on singles and read the story of your life. That's right. If you're single, this is about you. So if you're starring in this story, singletons, I can't help asking: Why are you letting someone else write the plot?

The stats show that you singles now comprise half the population and almost half the workforce, yet you're still underpaid, underinsured, and underrepresented in comparison to your married counterparts. (And the minimal difference in educational level between you and the marrieds doesn't justify it.) With elections rapidly approaching, it's of particular concern that 50% of the American population is represented by just 15% of Congress!

The other 85% of your representatives, an overwhelming majority, don't know what it's like to work round the clock just to pay for someone else to kiss their kids goodnight. They don't know what it's like to hoard medication in terror that a layoff will leave them uninsured with no backup plan. They don't know what it's like to shell out extra cash for car rentals, hotel rooms, and club memberships while their friends are admitted two for the price of one. They're married. They have spouses to lean on when life threatens to knock them down. And although this political underrepresentation goes a long way to explain how these injustices exist, the overriding question is why you, as the single majority, tolerate them.

Perhaps we can chalk it up to the political apathy in our society as a whole, but at least among women, singles are less likely to vote than marrieds. (I don't have comparable statistics on men, but if you do, please write in.) Please, if you're single and eligible to vote, register and show up at the polls. It only takes a few minutes, and if our turnout reflected actual demographics, we'd be 50% strong. Imagine what changes we might set in motion!

Hang on, I know your objections. You're thinking, "Elsie, you just finished enumerating how our current crop of (married!) politicians is out of touch with the values of its single voter base. How can you expect me to go out there and vote in one of those slimy singles surchargers? Wouldn't that be hypocritical at best and completely self-defeating at worst?"

But, in fact, I'm not asking you to do any such thing.

There's a problem with our two-party system. Most Republicans and even Democrats align themselves with the status quo of two married parents and 2.2 children (dog and white picket fence optional). But if you delve into the platforms of third (and fourth and fifth) party candidates, you'll often find ideas that are more in tune with the needs of singles. You'll even find that some of these candidates are single. (Remember Nader, anyone?)

That's why, with the exception of the presidential election, in which so much is at stake, I urge singles--and everyone--to vote for alternative party candidates. So many voters throw up their hands in despair of seeing an alternative candidate elected and vote for the GOP or the Dems, even if those parties don't represent their values. We forget that the only obstacle to the emergence of an independent, green, or working party congressman is our support!

It won't happen overnight, but if we stick together and get vocal at the polls, that persistence will pay off. Even if we never get a sympathetic third party candidate elected, our outcry can be the wake-up call that Washington needs to notice its constituents aren't June and Ward Cleaver anymore. Well, okay. We still have June and Ward, but these days June has a briefcase instead of a Beaver, she and Ward are divorced, and it's Ward who wears pearls and high heels in the kitchen...but only when nobody's watching.

And now, if you'll hand me that stepping stool, I'll come down off my pedestal. :)

Tomorrow, we'll continue the analysis of our latest data on singles but without the donkeys and elephants duking it out in the background.

Fun Link of the Day